Fourth performance of "The Slots Saga."

by David Grand
September 28, 2005

It'll appear on stage in Annapolis for 90 days, starting Jan.12, 2006 and ending on April 11, 2006, the period of time that the 421st session of the General Assembly will meet. The same actors will play their real life roles. The plot will be basically the same as in the 2005 performance (that was panned unmercifully by the critics), but which is more suspenseful. Same producers will be bankrolling it, the taxpayers. And with the same headstrong directors: Governor Bob Ehrlich, Senate President Mike Miller and Speaker of the House Michael Busch.

To refresh the memories of those who suffered through last year's performance as I did, and for those of you who were fortunate enough to miss it, here's a snapshot of how it went: It began as it ended, with no agreement on a slots bill, due largely to Miller and Busch clashing like gladiators, over whose proposed slots bill was the best, throwing more barbs at one another than the darts thrown at an English pub on a Saturday night; and with Ehrlich content with just cheering Miller on.

And when the session ended, I said in a column, that's that for slots at the tracks; for the death knell had been sounded loud and clear. But one critic summed up the session much better, describing it as "the theater of the absurd."

But just recently, I discovered that my eulogy  was premature, when the slots issue was resurrected from the grave by the Magna Entertainment Corp. announcing their plans to cut the number of racing days at Laurel Park and Pimlico Race Course from 196 to 112 next year, to sell the Bowie Training Center, and eliminate thoroughbred racing in the state from May 21 to Nov. 2 (save for an eight-day meet at Timonium's State Fair). Their justification for taking such drastic measures was, to put it bluntly, because they were losing their a-- at those two tracks.

That  shocking news had the Maryland Thoroughbred Horsemen's Association (MTHA) screaming like a peacock in heat, with its president Richard Hoffberger calling Magna's plan "the silIiest one he'd ever seen," and that they were considering options to resist it.

Both the MTHA and Breeders Association pleaded with the Maryland Racing Commission, which has the final say on what the racing calendar will be, to stop Magna from going ahead with its plan. But they must've been disheartened after hearing its chairman Tom McDonough say, that "Magna gave what I thought was significant justification for the actions they're taking." And with commissioner Terry Saxon criticizing them for their constant attacks on the House Speaker, who they regard as their arch enemy for leading the opposition to slots at the tracks, which they view as their salvation.

But commissioner Alvin Akman was more receptive to their pleas, saying "that in the absence of real help from Annapolis, we simply can't compete with the surrounding states, whose legislatures approved having slots at their tracks." It's a no-brainer, he added.

So, as it now stands, the final act cannot be written, until it's known how the legislature and governor will react to Magna's proposed plans. But one thing is certain, that for a slots bill to come out of the 2006 session would require Miller and Busch to do, what up to now has been the unthinkable, and agree (for the racing industry's sake) to "bury the hatchet," instead of in each other's head. If not, then once again the "Fat Lady" will be singing her mournful song at the end of the performance.

See ya at curtain time, and please don't leave during the intermissions.