You could've knocked me over with a feather

by David Grand
April 26, 2006

Well, that's not exactly true. For heavy as I am, it'd take a category 5 hurricane to bowl me over. But suffice to say, I was as wobbly as a drunken sailor when I read  that Judge Michael Galloway had approved a consent agreement between the county's Board of Election and a Sykesville resident that calls for the election of five commissioners by district, which dividing lines must conform with the map prepared by the redistricting committee in 2005. 

What made it all the more surprising, was that two days before the director of the board had announced that candidates for the five commissioner seats would be elected at-large, based on a legal opinion of the Attorney General's office, which she sought due to the failure of the General Assembly to approve a redistricting map.

I can only imagine the consternation that the judge's swift reversal of that decision must've caused among those who favored the AG's legal interpretation, whose mood went from one of elation to dejection in 48 hours.

And Sen. Haines was no doubt angrier than a wounded bull in an arena, and ready to gore any Democrat in sight, who he'd blamed for the delegation's bill not making it to the floor of the senate before the session ended.

But since he's not one to call it quits after a setback, I suspect he's racking his brain and sorting through his bag of tricks in order to come up with some ploy for pulling a victory out of the jaws of defeat.

Now, if they're not dancing in the streets, those living in South Carroll must feel that a wrong has been righted, since they'll have two voices at the commissioner's table, instead of just one as the delegation's preferred map called for.

Commissioner Perry Jones must also be happy as a dog with a bone, for his chances of being reelected are much greater than they would've been in the district the delegation's map put him in. Ah ,"he who laughs last laughs best." Surely, no one is more pleased with the final outcome than Del. Donald Elliott, who on his own initiative put together the bill for having five commissioners elected by district in a referendum; and who, after the results were known, even expressed his amazement that it was approved overwhelmingly.

But not  half as amazed, I'm sure, as were those members of the delegation who went along with his proposed bill (albeit grudgingly) because they felt it was doomed to fail at the polls.That false confidence on their part reminded me of what Lincoln once said about predicting future events: "The hen is the noblest of all creatures 'cause she only cackles after the egg is laid."

At long last, those wannabe commishes, who've been living in suspense waiting to see when they'd be able to "throw their hat  in the ring" (a lace hanky would do for women candidates), can breath a sigh of relief.  Plus, take added comfort in knowing they have a better chance of winning in the districts where they live, than running at-large, which would favor those who had the most money and name recognition.

It should be a ripsnorting, no-holds-barred campaign, as lively as a three-ring circus, albeit with fewer clowns and even fewer breathtaking performances. One sure bet is, that there'll be five Republicans elected; unless, that is, a Democrat emerges "from out of the blue" who has the charisma of a movie star, the tenacity of a bull dog and enough moola in their "war chest" to mount a vigorous campaign. Tis' a dream worth dreaming.